LMAO@Chobits fool's day translation

**mrwiseman** · January 6th, 2004, 11:21 PM

Mangalords [ML] (large Japanese to Spanish fansubbing group, now fusioned with Supein Fansubs under the name of Gokuraku Fansubs [GF]) released an extra Chobits fansubbed chapter (#28) on past Dec 28. It wouldn't be too strange to find a Chobits extra chapter, knowing there's Chibits out there.

The problem is, Dec 28 is Spain's fool's day. Many were fooled (not me though! But it was because I couldn't download it that day because I wasn't home, otherwise I'd have been fooled). This Chobits #28 chapter is actually a resubbed chapter 1. I'll post a few scenes translated into English so you get the idea of what's it like:

*WARNING: Chobits anime episode 1 spoilers*
*WARNING: hardcore NR-18 contents following.*

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Sample 1: Hideki just arrived to Tokyo. He sees a Persocon shop and goes near the shop window to see them.

Hideki: These dreamy sex dolls... ...they are very useful tools... ...besides, they cook for you... ...and they have these handles so you can hold them while they're sucking you... Besides, they come with extra functions, like chatting on MSN while you do them.

Hideki: Nobody has a Pezon.com in the fields! [Note: "pez?n" = "nipple" in Spanish] I'm tired of cows. I want a Pezon.com.

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Sample 2: When Sumomo sings a welcome song for Hideki, she's singing the Macarena...

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Sample 3: Hideki goes shopping, and he talks with the supermarket girl.

Girl: Shall I turn you on?
Hideki: Nah, stop it, bitch
Girl: [Damn, how to translate this!?? Uh... I'll just skip it.] The speed of my arm is three times that of a human.
Hideki: But I happen to like mature, interesting men with white sideburns and chest hair, you don't seem to get it you fool...

Hideki goes out of the supermarket...

Girl: And don't return, prude!

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Sample 4: Hideki sees Chii in the trash.

Hideki: AHHHH!! A MUMMY!
Hideki: Homicide? Murder? Death?
Hideki: Why do CLAMP put me in these hard situations? What do I have to do? What should I do first? Necrophilia? Sell her organs?

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Sample 5: Hibiya-san knocks the door Hideki just close, and he has to hide Chii. He sits her on the couch.

Hideki: Shut up, bitch.
Chii: Chiichii [Note: "Chichi" is another word for "pussy" in Spanish]

Hideki opens the door.

Hideki: Sergeant Callahan! W-What do you want?
Hibiya: I've brought you...

Damn. I best censor this. Just imagine what kind of brown thing in a bowl would she talk about.

After that disgusting scene, Hideki bows to thank her 4 times, while Hibiya sees Chii imitating him background and looks surprised.

Hideki: I'll eat your pussy.
Hideki: Even more...
Hideki: You like it, right?
Hideki: I'll keep doing it...
Hibiya: Oh
Hideki [realizes she has seen Chii]: AHHHH!
Hibiya: She do it.
Hideki: Didn't I do it properly?
Hibiya: Yes, but she turns me on more!
Hideki: She's a shemale Pezon.com.
Hibiya: So she has a thing down there... Bah, forget it. I wanted a yuri scene...

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